I am now jobless…

…and surprisingly I’m not panicking about it. (I mean I worry about everything usually)

My contract ending at my office job recently and I am now in search for a new job. Even though I have a phone and debt bill to pay I’m not too worried, I mean it’s not rent and it’s not household bills (I help pay these but I have support from the Mr and his family so we’re not on our own). I see this as a new opportunity to find something great more enjoyable and gain more experience to add to my CV.

I liked my job but I lost my passion and the novelty wore off quick, like I mentioned in a previous blog post, I get bored very quickly.

I love the thrill of job interviews and new environments to adapt to, and I always want more!

Wish me luck on my job search and my future adventures of eventually become an adult…erm…when does that happen?


Today I met a lamb named Molly!..

Me, my boyfriend and some friends decided to drive up to Trent park in Enfield North London …not to far from us and explore the mini animal park and woods the weather wasn’t brilliant but compared to the normal English weather it was great . So I took a few pictures and I thought I’d share 🙂


Molly the lamb


Flowers blooming in Trent park (Enfield North london)


Buck the bossy goat


This lil sheep was mid laugh haha


Hedwig is that you!?



The football was kicked so high it found a new home…



My amazing Iphone 4 photography skills..


and again my amazing Iphone 4 photography skills..






I have no patience for work. Why!?


So I’m sitting at my desk at work feeling like crap only in my head though. I’m pretty sure it’s just my hormones but that’s doesn’t make my point irrelevant!

It’s not that I hate my job, because I don’t. I’m happy to have an office job especially over my old retail jobs and I’m grateful to even have a job at all, as I know some people aren’t so lucky.

It’s just that this 9-5 job just doesn’t do it for me, again I prefer it over the random shifts you get retail and I like the routine. But I think I just don’t like working in general, that makes me sound lazy doesn’t it? Maybe I am lazy and yeah I don’t enjoy gettin up at 6am and coming home at 7:30pm, however that’s not the only reason.

I get bored easily, like very easily. “But only boring people get bored” yeah yeah whatever I don’t believe that crap. I just can’t have the same routine all the time and I hate getting up early for the same routine. All I want to do is travel the world, and gain experience of and from life before I find and settle into a job that is right for me, although I don’t know what the hell that is!

Also I can’t actually afford to travel, so I have to work in order to save but my saving skills are worse then my attention span. It’s a catch 22? Also I’m incredibly weak minded, this is something I don’t like I admit but it’s true. It gets me down feeling like things are never changing, that’s why I’ve had 3 jobs in the span of a year an a half.

I just don’t get how my colleagues can sit in this office for 6 years or so and not feel depressed when they drag themselves out of bed every morning. Money is an important aspect to a job for me however shallow that is, but that’s not enough, especially when you work 40 hours a week and don’t even have time to spend it.

I am also fickle to say the least, I wanted to be a film director, and I studied media at college, then I wanted to be video game developer, and studied this at college, a writer and god knows why else. Although I would still love to get payed to write things! I dropped out of uni within the first few months because again I got bored and felt it wasn’t right for me. Point being I need to hurry up and decide what I want, what makes me happy and what can pay the bills at the same time..

I don’t know where I’m going or what to do next, every time I start something new its not long before I’m already thinking about what I can do next. I personally see this as a positive thing, as it keeps me wanting more and striving to achieve more. But having patience is something I need, I also need to accept that things take a while and you have to start from the bottom to reach to the top (Drake reference).

Why do I struggle to be happy with things the way they are? and accept that if I work hard and save maybe one day I’ll be doing something that involves me waking up in the morning and feeling excited to start the day.

Is it actually possible to enjoy a job!?



Faith in Humanity

I’ve seen and experienced a few horrible things up close and personal in my short time on earth but I have watched and read about a whole ton more of terrible acts humans commit via the news and internet. Whether its political or violent nothing ceases to amaze me these days. Does that mean I have lost faith in humanity?


I’ll take some faith please.

Lets get into this post by just saying my thoughts are with those in Boston and the families affected. After hearing the news about the bomb attack in the US, I am sad to say I was not particularly shocked, yes I was disgusted and angered but not shocked. Its not as though things do not affect me and I am not completely accustomed to the sick thoughts and decisions of our human race, things tend to make me more angry these days over any other emotion.

I just don’t understand how people can let themselves be brain washed, be by religion (dare I say it), mental health, drugs or simply a big ego. I don’t mean that to sound ignorant and maybe I am ignorant, I understand that peoples minds work differently and the way they approach things are different, but how can it function so off the scale that you are content with taking the life of another human being or hurting them.

There are times when I feel that the majority of humans on this planet are either selfish, lazy, egotistical, violent, control freaks. Call me pessimistic that’s probably what it is, but how can I not feel that way when all I hear are stories of murder, wars, and politicians who couldn’t care less for the people of their own country. It pretty much boils down to the two words I hate the most…politics and religion. (I said it again sue me).

But to bring a positive view on humanity if you are also a bit of a pessimist like me, Patton Oswalt made a great point while giving his two cents on the horrible incident that took place in Boston. It made me look at things in a more optimistic light.

“This is a giant planet and we’re lucky to live on it but there are prices and penalties incurred for the daily miracle of existence. One of them is, every once in awhile, the wiring of a tiny sliver of the species gets snarled and they’re pointed towards darkness. 

But the vast majority stands against that darkness and, like white blood cells attacking a virus, they dilute and weaken and eventually wash away the evil doers and, more importantly, the damage they wreak. This is beyond religion or creed or nation.  

So when you spot violence, or bigotry, or intolerance or fear or just garden-variety misogyny, hatred or ignorance, just look it in the eye and think, “The good outnumber you, and we always will.”

Full post here: https://www.facebook.com/pattonoswalt?fref=ts

Maybe my faith in humanity has been restored.


I’d rather stay in bed. No work today.

I was going to call in “sick” today simply because I was tired. But I pushed my self out of bed, dragged my clothes on and said to my self “Get a life and get on with it”

I don’t know why I’m so lazy, everyone gets tired and would rather stay in bed but then how would the world run if no body got out of bed!?

Also I simply can’t afford to just take days off. I don’t have tons of bills to pay as I live with my boyfriend and his family, but I better get into the mind set of constantly earning and pushing my self or how will I survive when I have all the bills to pay and I don’t have enough money, not because I don’t have a job but because I’m to tired to take my self there!


Just popping to the loo..

“They must think I’m doing something creepy” at least that’s what I worry every time I get up from my desk at work to go to the toilet. It may be my fault though, I practically live on tea but my bladder is just weak, so no I refuse to take the blame for my numerous visit to the ladies room throughout the day. My body is a tap, as soon as I drink a glass of literally anything I’m visiting that damn loo!