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Day 2 unemployed

How do people do this all the time? I mean I am absolutely bored out of my mind. The funny thing is when I was working I had money to do all the things I wanted to do but no time, now I have all the time in the world but no money and I hate it so much. 

I have applied for about ten jobs already and have a few more on my list to apply for..and I am adamant that I will not be going back to retail god help me!

Yesterday I think I nearly lost my mind from boredom, today wasn’t as bad but this is only the beginning!

 

What if I’m going to go mad and become homeless….Image

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I am now jobless…

…and surprisingly I’m not panicking about it. (I mean I worry about everything usually)

My contract ending at my office job recently and I am now in search for a new job. Even though I have a phone and debt bill to pay I’m not too worried, I mean it’s not rent and it’s not household bills (I help pay these but I have support from the Mr and his family so we’re not on our own). I see this as a new opportunity to find something great more enjoyable and gain more experience to add to my CV.

I liked my job but I lost my passion and the novelty wore off quick, like I mentioned in a previous blog post, I get bored very quickly.

I love the thrill of job interviews and new environments to adapt to, and I always want more!

Wish me luck on my job search and my future adventures of eventually become an adult…erm…when does that happen?

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I have no patience for work. Why!?

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So I’m sitting at my desk at work feeling like crap only in my head though. I’m pretty sure it’s just my hormones but that’s doesn’t make my point irrelevant!

It’s not that I hate my job, because I don’t. I’m happy to have an office job especially over my old retail jobs and I’m grateful to even have a job at all, as I know some people aren’t so lucky.

It’s just that this 9-5 job just doesn’t do it for me, again I prefer it over the random shifts you get retail and I like the routine. But I think I just don’t like working in general, that makes me sound lazy doesn’t it? Maybe I am lazy and yeah I don’t enjoy gettin up at 6am and coming home at 7:30pm, however that’s not the only reason.

I get bored easily, like very easily. “But only boring people get bored” yeah yeah whatever I don’t believe that crap. I just can’t have the same routine all the time and I hate getting up early for the same routine. All I want to do is travel the world, and gain experience of and from life before I find and settle into a job that is right for me, although I don’t know what the hell that is!

Also I can’t actually afford to travel, so I have to work in order to save but my saving skills are worse then my attention span. It’s a catch 22? Also I’m incredibly weak minded, this is something I don’t like I admit but it’s true. It gets me down feeling like things are never changing, that’s why I’ve had 3 jobs in the span of a year an a half.

I just don’t get how my colleagues can sit in this office for 6 years or so and not feel depressed when they drag themselves out of bed every morning. Money is an important aspect to a job for me however shallow that is, but that’s not enough, especially when you work 40 hours a week and don’t even have time to spend it.

I am also fickle to say the least, I wanted to be a film director, and I studied media at college, then I wanted to be video game developer, and studied this at college, a writer and god knows why else. Although I would still love to get payed to write things! I dropped out of uni within the first few months because again I got bored and felt it wasn’t right for me. Point being I need to hurry up and decide what I want, what makes me happy and what can pay the bills at the same time..

I don’t know where I’m going or what to do next, every time I start something new its not long before I’m already thinking about what I can do next. I personally see this as a positive thing, as it keeps me wanting more and striving to achieve more. But having patience is something I need, I also need to accept that things take a while and you have to start from the bottom to reach to the top (Drake reference).

Why do I struggle to be happy with things the way they are? and accept that if I work hard and save maybe one day I’ll be doing something that involves me waking up in the morning and feeling excited to start the day.

Is it actually possible to enjoy a job!?

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What Motivates me? Where am I going

I DONT KNOW…but I do?

So I find my self balancing on string through out my life, I will happily be walking along then the next thing I know I will be hanging on for dear life. Sometimes I think the main thing that motivates me is money, but isn’t that everyone’s motivation in life. Yeah money is important and that’s why I go to work like everyone else. But what motivates me to keep going is the world and the thousand of things I can and will learn from it, and then that’s where the money comes into it, I just want to keep working to save to travel the world ..places like Tibet, Japan, Jamaica, Italy! and so many more. I just can’t take it any more I just have this feeling in my gut of excitement and impatience I need to get out there and discover the different cultures, the new environments and the people..open minded people! I don’t see my self sitting in an office for the rest of my life that is not my fate! (yes I’m sound dramatic here but don’t care)

Life feels like its taking forever to start but I know it takes hard work, I work for my future, our future and happiness.  I want to leave our footprints on the sands of time.

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